{Review + Giveaway} Who Done It? by Jon Scieszka

Who Done It?
An Anthology
Collected by Jon Scieszka
Pages: 352
Release Date: February 12, 2013
by Soho Teen (an imprint of Soho Press)

Goodreads / Purchase

A star-studded anthology with a devilish hook, whose proceeds benefit 826nyc: the fabulous literacy non-profit founded by Dave Eggers.

Can you imagine the most cantankerous book editor alive? Part Voldemort, part Cruella de Vil (if she were a dude), and worse in appearance and odor than a gluttonous farm pig? A man who makes no secret of his love of cheese or his disdain of unworthy authors? That man is Herman Mildew.

The anthology opens with an invitation to a party, care of this insufferable monster, where more than 80 of the most talented, bestselling and recognizable names in YA and children’s fiction learn that they are suspects in his murder. All must provide alibis in brief first-person entries. The problem is that all of them are liars, all of them are fabulists, and all have something to hide...

*A copy was provided by Soho Press for review purposes*

What a crazy book. What an outrageous, hysterical, cheesy, fantastic, ingenious book! This is the first anthology I’ve ever read, and wow was it awesome! The idea was so funny, and I loved the ending of the book when the verdict was given. The idea of a cheese-loving, gas-producing, book-bashing, author-hating editor named Herman Q. Mildew being knocked off because everyone hated him was absolutely awesome. The authors who participated in this book were just awesome, and I loved their individual stories. The more unbelievable, the better, I think was the motto for this book. I will admit that after about 150 pages I got kind of tired of reading the different alibis and kind of skipped to the authors I’ve actually read before, but other than that this book was completely cool.

Since there aren’t really any characters in this book (well, except Mildew himself) I’m going to instead discuss my favorite authors from this book and their little lines of laughs (if that makes any sense):

“It would have been quite good, though, wouldn’t it? Excuse me, I mean it would have been quite good. Someone else has, apparently, beaten me to the punch—or gunshot, hanging, stabbing, defenestration, or whatever method was used.”

~Page 29, Steve Brezenoff

“The fork I was holding came dangerously close to stabbing him in the throat, but I’m a lady and ladies don’t do such things. They just dream about them.”

~Page42, Jen Calonita

“This looks bad, I know.
All this blood.
On me.
But I assure you, this is not Herman Mildew’s blood;
or if it is, he placed it there voluntarily;
or if not, it was stolen from him by a person or persons unknown and then planted on me as the most likely suspect.

~Page 67, Larry Doyle

“Who’s making the accusation, anyway? Scieszka? Now, there’s a murderer. I’m not accusing anyone of anything, or course, but I will note that Scieszka is bald, and that a 2004 study by Harvard University found that men with male pattern baldness are seven times more likely to kill literary editors than men with full and plush heads of hair. So allow me to submit to evidence Exhibit A, my majestic puff of hair. You can’t deny my puff. It wasn’t me.”

~Page 131, John Green

“Lisa: Check Yahoo mail.
Laura: Can’t. On a run.
Lisa: Eeew. Stop being so athletic and check your email. Immediately.”

“Lisa: Well, you’re just going to have to kill him. Come over when you’re done with your run, and I’ll let you borrow some of my rat poison. You can bake him a cake or something.
Laura: Why do I have to be the one to kill him? Why can’t you kill him? You’re the oldest.
Lisa: God, you love reminding me of that, don’t you? It’s only two years! It’s not like you’re 23. We’re both in our mid-thirties.
Laura: I’m still in my early thirties.”

~Page 257 & 258, Lisa and Laura Roecker

And now is my favorite alibi of the entire book! I couldn’t stop laughing!!!

“Ahem. I’m here to offer my alibi.
No, HERE. In front of the line. Quit motioning the people standing behind me forward! …No! Person-so-tall-I-can’t-quite-see-your-face, don’t you dare cut in front of me! He was—I am—oh, for the love. Fine. Just a second.
NOW I’M STANDING ON A FOOTSTOOL. YOU CAN’T IGNORE ME. IT IS MY TURN.
What do you mean my alibi isn’t necessary? Don’t you wave dismissively!
…I—excuse me? I must be hearing you wrong. Did you say I’m too short to be a suspect? No, no, your exact quote was, ‘Someone as adorably wee as you couldn’t possibly have committed such a heinous crime.”
…You’ll never doubt I’m the murderer again! Even though I’m not! But you should at least do me the dignity of suspecting me! YOU. ME. NOW. I’m gong to leap over this counter and show you exactly how murderous I can be!
Well, just as soon as someone brings me a stepladder so I can actually climb over the top to strangle you.”

~Page 327, 328 & 329, Kiersten White

What a laugh! What a funny book! Gah! You guys really have to read this one!!!

4 pink flowers

~Giveaway~

~There will be one winner

~Giveaway ends on February 27, 2013 @ 12:00 A.M.

~This giveaway is US/CAN

a Rafflecopter giveaway

THANKS FOR ENTERING AND MAY THE ODDS BE EVER IN YOUR FAVOR!!!